I Lost My Grip

To quote a wise man, “Sometimes you start to lose your grip, but if you’re smart, it is during these times that you learn things you never knew.”

Well, I am retarded; therefore, I lost my grip.  But, I was smart enough to realize that I had lost my grip and took the necessary actions to rectify the situation.  There comes a time when a person’s “roll” must come to a screeching halt.  Mine has.  The days of having my cake and eating it too have come to an end!  I pulled the reins ever so gently (or as gently as the situation allowed) and said, “Woah!”  I am happy to say that for the time being I have regained my grip.

But sometimes I wish the government would just bail me out of my ridiculous predicaments rather than me having to deal with all of the problems that I caused upon myself.  People make mistakes and I shouldn’t be held accountable for ALL of the things I do wrong.  Relationships as we know them could cease to exist if I am not bailed out of my problems.  The entire infrastructure could collapse!  Left would be right, bottom would be top, cheating would be monogamy, gay would be straight, and AIDS would be a RASH!  You see, if I am continually losing my grip there is no other choice than a government bailout. 

So, if you ever see me beginning to lose my grip, stop for a minute and think – Do I really want everything I know to be true to become inverted?

(The answer is no.)